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adoption

Is Adoption Right for You

by BlondieWrites on April 26, 2010

Is Adoption Right for You

When it comes to adoption, you’ll want to consider that it is the most difficult decision that you’ll have to make. You’ll want to think about the responsibility of a child and you’ll also want to face some of the good times and bad times that are ahead of you. You’ll find that a puppy is much like a child. If you think that adoption is right for you, then you may want to get a dog or cat and see if you can handle that type of situation. If you pass, then you might want to look further into adoption.

There are some benefits to adoption. Not only will you be able to use the adoption to gain a new family member, but also you’ll be able to give yourself a brand new life. You’ll find that there are many emotional benefits to adoption. You’ll also find that there is some personal growth to adoption. Adoption is something that many people choose to do because they are able to help the world be better. You’ll also find that you are able to reach out for better things with the adoption of a child.

Before you start considering an adoption, you may need to look at yourself. First, you have to decide if you are ready to be responsible for another person. You’ll also want to think about your patience. Children can be difficult, but can you handle it? Is there a way for you to figure this out without adoption? Try to baby-sit a younger child. Also, you may want to take some parenting classes. This way you will be able to save yourself some time, energy, and also figure out if a child could thrive in your current environment.

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Adopting a Child With Special Needs

by BlondieWrites on April 18, 2010

Adopting a Child With Special Needs

There are many children out there that have special needs. As a result it does make it harder for them to be placed in an adoptive home. While every parent does wish for a healthy child both physically and mentally, taking care of such a child can be an extremely rewarding experience. There have been heartbreaking stories of couples that give a child up for adoption due to it being born with some type of special need. There are also adoptive parents that refuse to take home a child that isn’t healthy in all ways.

If you decide you are willing to adopt a child with special needs, you will need to evaluate what you are willing to take on. There are many different types of physical and mental disabilities that a child can have. There is also the factor of paying for their treatment and the time it will take to properly care for such a child. This isn’t a role that is right for everyone. You definitely need to make sure you know what you are getting yourself involved with.

Due to the nature of care for children with special needs, the majority of them are placed with the Department of Human Services. Contact them to express your interest in adopting a special needs child. They will likely require you to complete a variety of forms as well as classes. They want to be sure you will have the necessary skills for caring for a particular child. They may require you to take that special needs child into your home for a set period of time under foster care.

You will work with a social worker that comes in regularly to evaluate the situation and to provide support. Should things be going well and you do want to continue with the adoption process they can help you with it. Depending on the laws in that state you may be eligible for assistance when you adopt a special needs child. This is generally offered in the way of medical assistance to be sure their needs in that area doesn’t become a burden that you can’t meet financially.

This is also important as the extent of the special needs for the child may not be fully realized yet. The younger a child is the higher the risk is that there will be additional needs that are diagnosed later on. This is something you definitely need to be aware of if you are considering adopting a child with special needs.

You can also choose to adopt a child with special needs through private adoption. This can be more complex though and you won’t have ongoing support as you will through the Department of Human Services. However, if you have a great attorney on your side you can get the representation that you will need.

Many people that wish to adopt realize there are plenty of special needs children out there that need a loving home. They are willing to offer it even though they realize it will be a challenge. Yet it will also be a very rewarding experience and it can help them to get a child into their home in less time. If you feel this is something you would like to do, then find out more about it. Too many children with special needs never get adopted, and you can make sure at least one of them does.

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What Can You Expect When You Adopt a Child Through Open Adoption Methods?

The idea of an option adoption seems to be more and more popular. The decision to give up a child is usually not one that any parent can do easily. Still, they may realize that it is the best thing they can do for their child at this point in their life. They want to know who is going to care for their child though so they don’t just give them up and then wonder if they made the right choice.

With an open adoption, the parents that gave up the child will know where their child is and who they are with. In many of these cases they will meet with the adoptive parents many times before deciding that is the right how for their child. They want to be sure they give their child every opportunity to have a wonderful life. However, open adoption isn’t a good idea if you want to have your complete privacy. Are you willing to allow the real parents to have some type of interaction with your child? If not, then this isn’t the form of adoption you should be pursuing.

Should you be open to the idea of this form of adoption you certainly want to make sure the guidelines are clear to all parties involved. You don’t want to feel like you are merely the caregiver for a child instead of their actual parent. There are many different levels of open adoption that need to be considered. The level of communication you have with the real parents about the child should be explored.

For example with some open adoptions the birth mother is able to send letters to the child. In exchange she gets information on the child’s development and milestones. She also gets some photos at regular intervals. When the child gets old enough they may get to choose if they want to meet their birth mother or at least to write her letters. With other forms of open adoption there is much less communication that goes on.

Don’t agree to any form of open adoption if you aren’t really comfortable with it. Some people do because the desire to adopt a child is so important to them. However, they later on regret the fact that they have committed their family to such obligations. They may regret that they have to continue this bond with the people that gave up the child.

Other people are very compassionate though when it comes to an open adoption. They understand that it is extremely difficult for someone to give up a child. However, they are also very grateful for the chance to raise that child as their own. They want to keep that person involved in the child’s life as much as they can. Even with the best of intentions though situations can arise that are difficult.

For example the biological parents and the adoptive parents may have different ideas on how the child should be raised. This can lead to plenty of tension and anxiety in the household for all involved. An open adoption should only be accepted after both parties have attended counseling. Legal counsel should also be looking over the documents to make sure they can be upheld in a court of law.

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You Can Afford to Adopt!

by BlondieWrites on October 24, 2009

There are over 130,000 children in the foster care system in the United States today. Many children would find permanent home and loving families, if only those parents knew they could afford to care for the children.

Just when you thought you could not afford to adopt, knowledge comes to the rescue.  With the costs of private and international adoptions skyrocketing, one might think special needs adoption would be the same.  Surprise, it’s not!  In fact, in most cases, the adoptive parents receive a subsidy per child to help for their daily needs.

What is a subsidy?

It’s a monthly payment, paid to the adoptive parents, for the daily needs of a child.  These payments  vary, depending upon the needs of the child.  It doesn’t matter how much you make, the child can still qualify. The amount is different from state to state.  You can find out payment amounts here: http://www.nacac.org/adoptionsubsidy/stateprofiles.html

Adoptive parents can also be reimbursed for something called nonrecurring adoption expenses. The amount of this reimbursement also varies from state to state.  Items included in this can be the cost of lodging to visit your child, transportation, meal costs, court costs, and attorney fees  involved for paying the lawyer, etc.  You  pay these costs up front in most cases, and are reimbursed after the adoption is finalized.  The reimbursement is on a per child case.  For example…  you adopt a sibling group of four, and the state reimbursed up to $2000 per child.  You spent a total of $4,308 for everything involved in the adoption.  Meals, traveling there, the gas, the motels, the attorney’s fees, etc.  If you have the receipts, you should get every bit of that back.   In essence, this is what makes these adoptions free.  That figure is high, by the way.  It doesn’t cost that much to adopt, that’s just an example of how the reimbursement works. There is no cost for the homestudy either.

In many states, the county which has custody of the child or siblings will offer something called Transportation Costs or Transportation Help.

What this means is that if you live far away from the potential adoptive child or children, the county will transport the child to your home for visits.  If you live out of state, this can be very beneficial to the children and you.

Many would-be adoptive parents do not know that they can receive a monthly subsidy and medical assistance for children in the foster care system.  With the help of the media, and the late Dave Thomas, word is getting around about Special Needs Adoption.

You can afford to adopt.  If you have a home, rented or owned, and have a room for the children, you can do it.  Open your heart and home to a child.

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The Real Costs Associated With Adoptions

by BlondieWrites on October 24, 2009

You may have a heart for adoption, but find the prospect of the expense rather daunting. Learning about the reality of the costs involved, however, can give you a sense of what you are dealing with and a financial goal. It will be far less discouraging in the end if you learn about the fees and costs associated with adoption ahead of time. This also avoids getting partly through the process only to find out you can not afford it.

The expenses vary by state, agency, and the type of adoption. There are also various financial resources that can make adoption more affordable. Following is a general list of costs to give you an idea.

1. Agency fees

These vary quite widely, and the same agency usually has different fees for different countries. The categories and approximate costs of agency fees are:

*Application fee: $175-$200
*Home inspection or home study: $1500-$2500
*Dossier fees (international adoption), which involve legal documents from the child’s country of origin: $2500-$3000
*Adoption program fee, which varies by country: $7500-$12,250
*Orphanage fee (international adoptions)-some countries require that a donation be made to the orphanage in which the child lived, and differ by country. In China, the orphanage fee is between $3000-$4000. Be sure to ask your agency about this fee.

2. Post-placement supervision costs range between $200.00 to $1500.00.

3. Legal fees

Varying between $500 and $4000, legal fees encompass the preparation of paperwork and documents related to the adoption.

4. Health/medical care

You may pay for the prenatal care, delivery, and living costs for the time between the child’s birth and the time he or she comes into your home. These expenses can range from $10,500-$32,000.

Health and medical expenses for the child could potentially be relatively high or on-going, perhaps involving counseling, medication, or other specialized care. These costs are entirely dependent on the medical condition of the child.

5. Education costs

The cost of educating an adopted child is no different from any other child unless the adopted child has special needs (such as a learning disability). In an international adoption, there is also the possibility that the child’s education will need to include learning English. In these cases, it’s possible that extra counseling, tutors, or alternative education (such as homeschooling) will need to be implemented.
 
There are various loans, grants and scholarships available to assist eligible adopted children with college tuition and other educational costs. Some states, such as Connecticut, offer assistance to aid in the tuition costs of post-secondary education. Your local department of education will have information specific to your state.

6. Financial resources

There is also financial assistance for the actual costs of adoption. Your employer may offer expense reimbursements through an adoption foundation. Many states offer subsidies and the federal government offers tax credits for adoptive families.

While the state federal aid is usually confined to domestic adoptions and those through the U.S. foster care system, that is not necessarily the case; it is worth looking into. Check with various banks, too – some of them offer low-interest loans to cover adoption costs.  

Once you get a handle on some of the costs, you may find that adoption is a possibility for you.

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What You Need to Know About Transracial Adoptions

by BlondieWrites on October 24, 2009

Transracial adoptions are nothing new, but attitudes and motivations about them have changed. In the 19th century, transracial adoptions occurred, but they were generally scandalous, especially if ethnic parents adopted a Caucasian child.

After World War II, Americans adopted war orphans from around the world out of humanitarian concerns. Following the Vietnam War, American families adopted Vietnamese children orphaned by the war or fathered by American soldiers. Now, transracial adoptions are more and more common, both domestic and international.

If you are considering adopting a child of a race different from your own, here are some helpful things to keep in mind.

1. Learn as much as you can about your child’s culture

In the past, emphasis was placed on conforming the adopted child to the culture of the parents. However, a healthier approach is to blend both cultures and emphasize similarities and celebrate differences. If you are adopting a child from China, for example, spend time reading up on the area he is from – the history, traditions, and cultural quirks. Transition will be made much easier if the child feels welcome, and having elements of his culture in your home can make him feel more welcome.

2. Be ready for the comments and opinions of others

Whether solicited or not, people will comment on your transracial, adoptive relationship. Model appropriate responses for your child – rather than getting defensive, answer such comments nicely and informatively. Give facts and briefly recount your positive experience with your adopted child. If you are prepared for such opinions ahead of time, you are less likely to respond angrily. Be frank with your adopted child about the realities of prejudice and how to handle it without bitterness.

3. Celebrate your child’s culture

It can give your adopted child a sense of identity to celebrate holidays from her culture. For example, parents of African-American children may celebrate Kwanza; those who have a child from Guatemala could celebrate the Guatemalan Independence Day on September 15.

Learn about some of these traditions and teach them to your adopted child, and also teach her about your own cultural traditions and holiday celebrations. You might even celebrate your traditional holidays along with your child’s, thus teaching about the compatibility of cultures and fostering a sense of belonging. 

Studies have shown that transracially adopted children thrive in homes where these sorts of cultural socializations take place. Learn, teach, and celebrate.

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What You Need to Know Before Adopting

by BlondieWrites on October 24, 2009

Adopting a child is an exciting and wonderful event. The process will go a lot more smoothly if you prepare yourself with knowledge about how adoption works before you begin. Here are some things to keep in mind as you consider the adoption process.

* Open, semi-open and closed adoptions

This is the most important decision you will make as you begin the adoption process.

In an open adoption, an adopted child can maintain contact with his birth parents. An open adoption includes letters, emails, phone calls, and personal visits. It can be helpful for the child’s sense of wholeness and healing to be in contact with his birth parents, but this depends on the situation and lifestyles of the biological parents, of course.

As the adoptive parents, it is your decision as to whether you will allow open contact, but it should be a child-focused decision. It’s not about your convenience or preference; it’s about what is best for the adopted child.

Semi-open adoptions limit but do not prohibit the contact the adopted child can have with her birth parents. Generally, semi-open adoptions include receiving written correspondence and gifts from the biological parents, but no personal visits or phone calls.

Closed adoptions mean no contact is allowed between the adopted child and her birth parents. 

* Domestic adoptions

Domestic adoptions, or adopting a child from your own country, can mean a long wait. Also, babies and children up for adoption in the United States tend to have behavioral or physical problems, which may or may not be an issue for a prospective adoptive parent. It is easier to obtain the medical history of the child in a domestic adoption, however.

The cost of domestic adoptions varies according to state, but generally they include an application fee, attorney fees, psychiatric and physical examinations for parents, and supervision after the adoption. These and any other costs or fees as per your state range in cost from $5000 to $40,000.

* International adoptions

Almost always closed, international adoptions are comparable in cost to domestic adoptions, averaging between $7000 and $30,000. This does not include travel, however. Overall, international adoptions are faster, but obtaining details about the child such as his medical history can be almost impossible.

* Adopting through the foster system

By far the least expensive way to adopt (averaging between $0-$2500), adopting through the foster system is a viable means of adopting a child. However, adoptive parents have less choice in the age, race, gender, and other particulars regarding the child they want to adopt.

Understanding how the process works and the variables involved go a long way in facilitating the adoption process.

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How to Prepare Your Home for a Foster Child

by BlondieWrites on October 24, 2009

A significant part of preparing your home for a foster child is preparing yourself. A prospective foster parent must prepare his or her heart to deal with the sacrifice, the pain (sometimes foster children have truly tragic stories), and the joy.

It’s also important to see to it that the child is comfortable in his or her new foster home. Of course, if you are prepared mentally and emotionally, that adds greatly to the child’s comfort. There are some practical things, too, that you can do to make the foster home a place of refuge and love.

* Know your state’s requirements

Much of the physical aspects of your home – types of toys, sleeping accommodations, etc. – are determined by the state. An inspector or case worker will come to your home and determine whether it is suitable for a foster child, looking for proper safety measures (such as smoke alarms), number of bedrooms (some states require a separate bedroom for each foster child), etc. It will make the process go a lot more smoothly if you find out your state’s requirements ahead of time.

* A welcoming home

Besides state regulations, you probably want your home to project a welcoming and peaceful atmosphere. Try to keep the household quiet on the day of the foster child’s arrival. Let your children know they will need to be quiet and calm, but not stifled. Make sure the house is free of clutter which can be overwhelming to a child who is already feeling traumatized. If you have pets, especially big dogs, put them outside or in a separate room at first. 

* Put valuables away

Keep any “tempting” items, such as jewelry, electronics, or other valuables out of sight. As you adjust to this new child and discover his strengths and weaknesses, you will learn where you can relax the rules and where you need to tighten them up.

* The child’s own space

Remember that a foster child is going through something traumatic, and may have known little but trauma for most of her life. She will need a space of her own where she can go to process her thoughts and feelings when she feels overwhelmed. Prepare this special space, most likely a bedroom, by making it welcoming and peaceful – a comfortable chair, a neatly made bed, some books, and maybe some stuffed animals. Quiet, soft toys are a good place to start.    

* Preparing your other children

Of course there will be a period of adjustment, and some bumps along the road are to be expected. To prevent any big set-backs, though, it is a good idea to prepare your children for the foster child. Let them know how things are going to be different, and why you are taking a foster child in to your home.

The whole family can participate to make the fostering experience a joyful and rewarding one for everyone involved.

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